Thanks, but No Thanks
In my post about misusing the reply-all feature in email, I expressed my dislike of thanking someone for a thank you, particularly via email. While I stand by that notion, I will say that not thanking someone at all (email or no email) is even worse.
When I was growing up, my Mom used to always ask me and my brother to write Thank You notes to our friends and relatives after receiving gifts from them. That is a habit that has stuck with me my whole life because I truly think that when you are the recipient of a gift or when someone goes out of their way for you, then acknowledging the gesture is important. After all, they took the time to think of you for whatever reason so the least you could do is take a little of your time to express your gratitude. (Yeah, I know I sound preachy today but this topic gets me riled up)
Not to say that I expect recognition for every selfless thing I do but there are times when I firmly believe that a Thank You note is warranted. Such a time is when you receive a wedding gift from someone. You went to the trouble of mailing out those over-priced invitations that no one really wanted to receive in the first place but you don’t put forth the same level of effort to send Thank You notes? Jesus. I had a friend who got married last year and I sent her a $100 gift card to a place where she was registered. I never heard a word from her and that was many months ago that I sent the gift. Part of the reason why this annoys me is because as the person sending the gift I would at least like to be assured that the gift wasn’t lost in the mail. In this case, as luck would have it, the place where I got the gift card didn’t offer tracking of mailed gift cards so I guess I’ll never know. Maybe it is like one of those stupid 80′s tv sitcoms where there’s a huge misunderstanding…I’m upset that I never got a thank you note but it really got lost/stolen and my friend is thinking I’m the bitch who not only declined the wedding invitation but also neglected to get a gift. Yes, I’m sure that’s what happened. It’s the most awkward of situations because it’s not as if I’m going to call her up and go “hey, did you receive that gift card I sent you?”
Most recently I sent a wedding gift to another friend and she did send me a Thank You note…via Facebook message. At first I thought, “how sweet of her to acknowledge the gift right away so that I knew it reached her”. But, as the weeks went by and no written Thank You appeared in my snail mailbox I realized that I’d best not hold my breath.
To these people I’m probably being too rigid and old-fashioned about this. That’s okay because to me, they’re ungrateful and clueless. And I’m totally going to ask for my money back when they get divorced.